On The Plate ... 9/21/06

15 Thoughts to Think About

This past weekend destroyed me. My brain is sunburned, tired, attention deficient and confused. Deal with it. I'm heading to Chicago this weekend for a Big Ten fest. Better and bigger noise to come next week.

Go…

1. Best feeling of the weekend… Upper deck, Section 521, M&T Bank Stadium, Charm City, Maryland, USA, national anthem blaring, four jets buzzing the stadium…glorious with a capital G…the Ravens mutant-fest was in tip-top shape at M&T and it felt damn good to be a part of it.
2. New epiphany… Dale Jr's are out, Sterling Marlins are in. The Marlins I had on Sunday were like little plastic bottles of nectar. It was hot as balls at that GD Stadium.
3. M&T Bank Stadium quote of the week… "Hey man, tell your buddy who shows up for the Cincinnati games that I'm going to kill him this year. He's a good kid, don't get me wrong. But tell him I'm going to f'ing kill him." Great, will do.
4. Biggest screwdriver to the kidney… Noles loss to Clemson. For the 351st time, will someone please shoot Jeff Bowden? And for the 127th time, will someone make sure that Bobby Bowden takes his GD medicine daily? The man clearly suffers from every-term memory loss. (Yes, that means short and long-term memory). The Noles lack of offense for the last 6 years? Unacceptable. Giving up a 47-yard scamper in the last minute of the game? Unacceptable. Giving up a touchdown with 0:09 seconds to go to lose 27-20, while crushing my 'under 46' points bet? Devastating.
5. Hate piling of the weekend… the Canes…especially when I have some serious kwan (aka, coin) on them and they get throttled at Louisville. Louisville? Please. Goodbye Larry Coker. Did you like the Canes stomping on the Cardinal at the 50-yard line before the game? Me neither. Do that junk and then win. Don't do it and get embarrassed. New synonym… Bozo is to "the Clown" as Chuck Amato is to "the Coach."
6. Dumbest media craze… how happy is the media that Notre Dame lost? Those SOBs love to pump up a team and then watch that team fall on its face. And the Irish did just that. For the record, I told you that Michigan would score some points on the Irish. I just thought the Irish O would dominate. Wrong. That silly offense was nowhere to be found. And the Irish D? Yikes.
7. Worst home-job since Jeffrey Mayer… the Sooners at Autzen Stadium. 100% hands down hosed. Stoops & Co have every right to be pissed. That ref should be put down. How does a team of officials miss 3 blatant calls back-to-back-to-back? I'll tell you. It's called "Pac-10 officials cheating to give the conference some semblance that they can hang with the big boys." The Pac-10…keeping the tradition of being an absolute joke alive for yet another weekend.
8. Best game of the year thus far… despite the final score only being 7-3, the Auburn W over LSU takes the cake. I'm still convinced both of these teams could beat anyone in the country right now.
9. Hats off to… the Florida Gators. A come from behind W at Neyland Stadium is quite impressive.
10. Best player I saw over the weekend… Trojans' QB John David Booty. That kid throws f'ing missiles. It helps when Dwayne Jarrett is catching those missiles, but they are missiles nonetheless.
11. Team to be most proud of themselves… the Huskers of Nebraska. Sure, they lost 28-10 at The Coliseum, but the kids were in the game in the fourth quarter. If this game was truly a measuring stick, give Bill Callahan and his kids some credit. The Huskers are on the serious up & up.
12. How 'bout them… Dores! 0-3, baby! F. The kids lose another heartbreaker this past weekend to the Hogs. Why? Because the Dores botched an extra point in the second quarter that forced them to go for two to tie the game early in the fourth quarter. And of course they didn't convert. And of course they missed a field goal with a minute to go to win. Now, that's the Vanderbilt football I know and love. (On a serious note, and yea, I'm going to keep chirping this, the program is moving in the right direction. I like W's, but I'll take very close losses. At some point, they'll turn into W's.)
13. Dumb Dumb of the Week Award… Tennessee State offensive lineman Jamel Bell. Why? The dude was sitting in class when police barged into the classroom to arrest him. Why? The normal charges: armed robbery with a firearm, two counts of attempted felony murder, armed carjacking, possession of a firearm during the commission of a felony, two counts of grand theft of a firearm and grand theft. What's the point? Bell should have found a better way to spend his precious time instead of sitting in poetry class.
14. Question of the Week… Where would you be right now if Kenny Loggins never existed? (I just presented this to some folks at work who gave me blank, puzzled stares in response. Awesome.)

On the Slate…

Wisconsin at Michigan (-14) - I'll be at Will's Northwoods Inn in Chicago for this annual gem. MuskieFest will be going on. I'll be downing Leinenkugels. And I'll be taking the Wolverines to cover, although I won't let that be known to the hundreds of Badgers fans that I'll be mingling with. The Badgers, unfortunately for my hundreds of new found friends, are average at best this year.

Penn State at Ohio State (-17) - This is going to be a murder. Why? 1) Buckeyes lost in Happy Valley last year. Revenge be on the brain. 2) The Nittany Lions got murdered at Notre Dame. Notre Dame ain't the Buckeyes. 3) The Buckeyes head to Iowa City next week. In other words, Tressel & Co. want to be sharp and make a statement.

Arizona State (+8.5) at Cal - What do I know about these mutt teams? Nothing. But I think 8.5 points is a lot to give mighty Dirk Koetter and his Sun Devils. (In all honesty, I just wanted to write Dirk.)

Alabama at Arkansas (-1) - In a game of sheer mediocrity, I'm taking the Hogs. It's the first road game for the Tide, Mitch Mustain is gaining confidence after a much needed W for the Hogs at Vandy and this game may make or break Houston Nutt's tenure in Fayetteville. In other words, the Hogs are going to be fired up.

Troy (+22) at Nebraska - If I've learned anything after the first 3 weeks of 'ball, I've learned not to F with the Trojans of Troy. Troy will be up for this game. The Huskers are coming home after a tough loss in LA. 22 points is a lot of points. I've got a feeling here, and that feeling is Troy.

Boston College (-7) at NC State - All of a sudden this game becomes hugely important for the not so mighty Eagles. BC, my friends, is officially in the ACC hunt. Bizarre? Completely. Last week's squeaker over BYU at home wasn't necessarily impressive, but the Eagles probably had a Clemson W hangover. At least that's what I'm believing. And we all know the Wolfpack are horrible, and just getting worse. Amato has lost control of his sinking ship and that doesn't bode well in directing his team of bandits to give it their all, especially if the Pack falls behind early. I like 4 fights in this game and BC covering.

USC (-23) at Arizona - Trojans by 40. Who's with me?

Notre Dame (-3) at Michigan State - Irish by 40. Who's with me? (I'm not joking. I truly believe that the Irish will come back from last week's serving from Michigan with a vengeance and lay it on John L and his boys. The Spartans are due for a pounding, especially after last year's flag-planting at the 50-yard line at the Golden Dome.)